Wedding size might be the biggest decision a couple makes after saying yes. This One Gotta Go card puts four options together: just the two of you at the courthouse, immediate family only in a small intimate setting, 50 to 80 people with close friends and family, and a full celebration with 200 or more guests.
Three options stay possible, and one is off the table forever. Think about your personality, your family and your budget. Then make your pick and share whether you are a courthouse couple or a big party couple, and see how many of your friends agree.
The 4 choices on this card
A. Just the two of you, courthouse
Just the two of you at the courthouse keeps the day simple, personal and affordable. It is all about the couple. Some families feel left out when couples elope, which makes this the choice many people cut to avoid hurt feelings.
Keep it if: You care about the marriage more than the party and love the idea of a quiet, simple day.
B. Immediate family only, small intimate
Immediate family only keeps the day intimate while including the people closest to you. It is a nice middle path. It can also leave friends out, which makes it a candidate for the cut if friends are like family to you.
Keep it if: You want your parents and siblings there but prefer a small, calm and personal celebration.
C. 50-80 people, close friends and family
A wedding of 50 to 80 people includes close friends and family without becoming overwhelming. It is a popular choice. Some feel it is a compromise that leaves out extended family, which makes it a possible cut.
Keep it if: You want to celebrate with your closest people and still have time to talk to every guest.
D. 200+ people, full celebration
A full celebration with 200 or more people is a big party with everyone you know. It is unforgettable. It is also the most expensive and stressful, and the couple barely gets to talk to each guest, which makes it the easiest cut for many.
Keep it if: You come from a big family, love a huge party and want everyone there to celebrate with you.
Our take
We would cut the 200 plus guest celebration. It is a spectacular party, but the cost and stress can overshadow the day, while the other three leave more room for meaningful moments. The most fun debate usually comes down to eloping against the big wedding, since it is two completely different philosophies. Ask everyone what size wedding they had or want, and why, and you will hear some great family stories.
How to play this card with friends
- Read the four choices out loud.
- Everyone picks the one they'd eliminate at the same time.
- Explain your pick. This is where the fun starts.
- Use the follow-up questions below to keep it going.
Follow-up questions to keep the debate going
- Which wedding size truly matches your personality?
- Is eloping romantic or unfair to family?
- How many guests is too many?
- What wedding style would you add to this card?
Want more debates like this? Get the One Gotta Go card game for game night, family dinners and road trips. Shop the decks.
Eloping vs Big Wedding: quick answers
What does it mean to elope?
To elope traditionally meant marrying in secret, but today it usually means a very small wedding with just the couple, and sometimes a few witnesses, often at a courthouse or a scenic location. Many couples elope to save money or keep the day personal.
How many guests are at an average wedding?
Guest counts vary widely by region, culture and budget, from a handful of people to several hundred. Many couples choose somewhere in the middle. The right number is the one that fits the couple's budget, families and idea of a perfect day. Talking about the guest list early helps avoid surprises later.
